It's hard to believe, but today marks 6 years since my dad had that major stroke that left him in need of a full-time caregiver.
While other people were still focused on the events of 9/11 six years ago today, my family had shifted focus to Sacred Heart Hospital in Spokane Washington as my dad was being treated by doctors fighting to save his life after he had suffered a massive stroke.
Six years later I have been through hell and back, fought my way through burnout and depression, had my best friends stand steadfastly by me and coax me through the rough spots and seen other friends fade into the background. I have learned a lot about what it means to be a caregiver and discovered that people can wear themselves out so much they collapse unconscious while standing having a conversation with someone. I have watched as doctors say my dad has under two weeks to live, seen doctors take one listen to his irregular heartbeat and give him Nitro then rush him off to the hospital only to have his normal doctor shake her head and inform them his heart *always* sounds like that.
Being a family caregiver is not something to be undertaken lightly. I have watched others try to take on the tasks that I trudge through, they never last more than a week, maybe two. I can quote medications off the top of my head more easily than I can remember my home phone number. I can do the work of two nurses and a physical therapist and still have to pull off the home maker and cook and maid chores before I can start work at my home business I am trying to run. It is a difficult grueling life, being a family caregiver, one that can drive you to the edge of insanity and then will quite happily shove you over that edge.
So, here's to six years of being a full-time caregiver to my dad, and to another 20+ that I hope I am needed by him for. I don't regret for a moment having been the one to take on this task, even if there are times I sit and cry and think how I should just walk out and let one of my older siblings be the responsible one.
Wednesday, September 12, 2007
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1 comments:
Hi Sandra,
I just jumped over here from the PPP board, and oh my, I can somewhat relate. My dear Dad passed away 2 years ago Oct 19 after 5 years of dealing with strokes...several of them, that left him in the end unable to do anything. His birthday is next week, and he's on my mind a lot. We were very involved helping, hospitals, in and out of rehab, nursing homes, home again, I'm sure you know it all too well. I was the one with him when he passed on to heaven.
Now, we keep up with Mom, who has been a caregiver since my disabled brother was born...he still lives with her, but we have to keep on top of things a lot....it's only a matter of time until the next "big thing" happens.
It does tend to drive you nutsy, but it also keeps us on our knees, praying for strength and wisdom for the next step, God has been faithful in helping in unexpected ways...not that it makes it all easy, just reassuring to know He's got things all planned out for us, we just have to stay in tune with Him...therein lies the challenge.
Wish I had some sage advise, but honestly, these things are just a one day at a time kinda thing.
God bless you for what you are doing, it is above and beyond what many would do.
Claudia
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